I think I might become a personal trainer. I understand that it's a non-conventional idea considering the shape I'm in, but think about it. I'd specialize in helping people who are intimidated by the usual hyper-fit trainer.
Me: Ok, on the treadmill for 15 minutes.
Client: Let's see *you* do the treadmill for 15 minutes.
Me: Nice try. You aren't paying me to run the treadmill, so get moving!