Bloodthirsty Little Bastards

I've had many pets over the years. Dogs, cats, birds, hamsters, lizards, you name it. Had a roommate once with a pet tarantula. But of all the critters I've shared accomodations with, none have been so ferociously vicious as rabbits.

Done laughing?

Rabbits are Lagomorphs, but we call them cutesy names like "bunnies" to conceal their true nature, that of fanged bloodlusting devils. They pretend to be meek and mild, but put two of them together and look out, you're liable to have blood splattered walls in short order.

We have three house rabbits. Fred and Java are a bonded pair, and Ozzie is an unattached buck. We tried several times to bond Oz, but in each case beligerence soon won out over romance, and bunnies hold a grudge!

Pet a bunny and they feel so soft and cuddly, but if you look and feel carefully, you'll find scars from old battles, and ragged flesh along the edges of ears, where chunks were torn free. Faces get bitten, as do asses, and they have razor sharp teeth and aren't afraid to use them.

For all that, I love my bunnies. I've been bitten once, lightly breaking the skin, while breaking up a fight. Ozzie has let me feel his teeth a couple of times, letting me know that he could've bitten me if he'd wanted. Both times, I reminded him about manners by flicking him firmly on the nose. He got the message, and headed for under the bed, where he could plot my eventual doom.

Mostly though, we get snuggles and cuddles and love from them. But I'm wary, because that "vorpal bunny" joke from Monty Python's Grail? It wasn't far from the actual truth.